I'm sorry you lost you girlfriend

family
I want you all to meet someone, 16 year old me. Fun, loud, cocky and spontaneous. I was care free and gave less than zero fucks about anything. I didn't stress about anything more than making sure my hair and makeup was perfect before leaving my bedroom for the day; no not even leaving the house...
Surprisingly somewhere over the past 5 years somethings changed. 

Dear my fiancé,

Do you feel cheated, that the girl you fell for is no longer the girl your engaged to? In some ways you should, it's kinda false advertising right? Well I'm sorry you lost your girlfriend, but you did gain a fiancé and two children.

I'm sorry I no longer ask how high when you say jump, it doesn't mean I love you any less. But hey let's face it we both went to extreme lengths to try please each other when we were first dating, it's what you do because you want them but once you have them you relax, get comfy and true colours show. 
You don't only relax and dull down on compliments and nice gestures, you also let yourself go. I'm sorry I'm no longer that slim yet curvy girl with perky boobs. I no longer have time to take pride in my appearance and that has blown my self confidence put the window. 

But guess what baby? I'm not sorry that I lost my body to gain our two boys. That my makeup sits there staring at me rather than being on my face. I actually don't mind the little rut we are stuck in, day in day out. You know why? Because we do it together, as a family, as one. 
 
Love Tiarne x

Letter to my 15 year old self || KELLY

Guest blogger
Please welcome Kelly, from The Zoo Keeper Blog! Kelly has written a letter to her fifteen year old self. If you enjoy Kelly's writing and would like to see more, visit her on Instagram @thezookeeper_blog or on her website www.thezookeeperblog.com


Oh hi there 15 year old me,


How does that pineapple cruiser taste? You applied your clear mascara today? Yes, your hair is dead straight, no kinks!


This is an exciting time. Life is shifting for you right now, you are becoming a woman!


You will soon be able to apply for your learners permit. Now, I know you are excited to finally gain your independence and have your own set of wheels. However my advice to you is don’t be so cocky… READ THE DAMN BOOK. You will fail the test miserably twice and have success third time lucky, however it goes to show you don’t know everything. Maybe Dad was right after all?!


You’ve just scored your first job. It’s walking distance, it’s $4.90 an hour and you get a free meal at the end of each shift. KFC equals dream job. Or does it? You will soon realise the fryer burns and the slaps on the bum are not worth it. However don’t be disheartened, although you didn’t make it past your trainee stage there is plenty of opportunity out there in the big wide world. 


You’ve had your first taste of alcohol. If I remember correctly it was a strongbow cider and you hated it! However you gulped it down and told everyone how much you loved it. Stick to the cruisers, they are more your style. You will eventually grow to widen your palette.


Boys. Ah. Boys. They aren’t as scary as you may think! Did you know you will actually meet the man of your dreams in only three years? I know you worry day in day out that you are approaching the big sweet 16 and haven’t sealed your first kiss. However, just trust me it will all happen in good time. 


I know your biggest hurdle right now is confidence. Past events have rattled you and you are often nervous and scared. Well future Kelly can tell you it gets easier. Of course as you grow your worries and fears change however you will be able to deal with them better. This I promise you.


You have amazing friends and a loving and supportive family who will all still be by your side well into your 30’s. 


Stay strong, keep smiling, and go easy on those cruisers.


Love your 33 year old self xx



Letters to my 15 year old self

blog
Last Thursday I was listening to a segment on the radio which was about celebrities who have written letters to their younger selves. It was quite inspirational and positive to listen to. This week I've teamed up with 7 other bloggers. We are all going to share a letter to our 15 year old selves! For myself it's also a little celebration post about moving out of my teen years officially this year. Yep I'm half way to 40! 

Well hey there 15 year old me! 
Hair extentions in, makeup on, fake tan? CHECK. Oh and don't forget that overly frilly pair of underwear you for some reason think are super sexy. 
Don't forget your bottle of Pash n Pop or Trevi either girl. 
That pretty much sums up your life from 15 - 17. Alcohol, Fun, Boys, Friendships and Love. 

Let's start with love.. Or should I say heart brake? I'm sorry to brake it to you gorgeous girl but that boy your head over heels in love with. Yes, the one who treats you so well and makes you the happiest girl in the world. He will brake your heart. Smash it into tiny pieces and leave you an emotional wreck. 
My advice is, don't shut yourself down so much. There are so many people around you that care and want to help you. You may not realise it but this is the moment your depression really hits hard and it's a journey I want you to not experience. 
You need help now, not in two years time. 

You know one good thing that came from your now ex bf. A large group of new friendships. Friendships you keep even long after that relationship fades away.  One special one in perticular, after you finish reading this 15 year old me, go hug Peter Clarke really tight, even tighter than you normally do. Treasure every moment with him. Don't ask me why, just do it. He is one person who you have a lot to thank for, a gorgeous soul. 

At 16 you have already met your dream man, not that you would believe me if I said who! Just before your 18th birthday he will propose to you and 2 and a bit months before your 19th birthday you will give birth to a healthy baby. This baby brings a whole new meaning to life for lots of family members. 

If I could give you any advice, it would be this...
Don't take anything for granted, life is short! You will loose people who mean everything to you. But you can keep going. Be everything they would want you to be and more. Make them proud. Don't listen to people who try to bring you down. Your hot and they are probably, no wait they are deffinitely just jealous ✋
Stay true to yourself, your morals and your goals. You can be anything you want to be! 

Love your settled down almost 20 year old self. 

Ps, you get your happily ever after very soon. xx

A letter to my pre baby self

Letter
Dear Tiarne, 

There is a big amazing world out there, you may not think it now but one day you will want to explore it! Go on! Live it and love it! Drive for days and laugh for hours. 
Dance like no one is watching and sing like your in the shower. 
Live with no regrets and learn from all your mistakes. 

Believe in yourself and back yourself into every decision you make. Chase your dreams and reach for the stars, because girl you deserve it! 

When you think of something and say I want to do that one day. Make it TODAY. Don't put anything off, you never know how long you have on this earth. 

Kind Regards, 
Tiarne Straatman. 
A 19 year old mother to a 10 month old boy. Engaged to a gorgeous man who provides for us and treats me like a princess. I love my life, your life? Our life. 
I love how life has turned out. 
But if I could turn back time... I would fulfill a few more dreams of mine and live a little lighter for a while. Travel around care free, study some more and waste precious time! 💕


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